Looking for a sense of purpose

I don’t normally include much personal stuff in my blog but maybe I am not sure what else to write about today.

Adding in a few photographs already on my blog to break up the text.

I think I have been through three phases since this going into lockdown. Of course I have had a couple more weeks than most people because of my cold, though at that point, being a cautious soul and risk adverse, I had practically decided to initiate my own encounter avoidance scheme.

The first phase was “disorientation”: way out of my comfort zone, missing my normal routine and social contacts.crafty coffee friends

The second phase was “reaching out”: deciding that at least I could engage through the blogsphere, following more blogs and writing more posts.

April montageMay montage

The third phase that I feel I have now entered is “resignation”: accepting that this is going to go on for a long, long time, seeing that the graphs instead of plummeting seem to be leveling out. Sinking deep inside myself and my life, looking for a sense of purpose.

I think the only things that have ever given me a sense of purpose are helping people and being creative. bringing up a family fulfilled both those purposes and was my happiest time. daughter

Well helping people is difficult at present so I am concentrating on the creativity. My main creativity is concerned with my latest project and focusing on that stops me thinking about all that I cannot do. But in the meantime, I haven’t much else to share so if I seem quiet that is why.

22 thoughts on “Looking for a sense of purpose

  1. Now I want to know what your latest project is. 🙂
    I am just sitting here wondering if it is folly to go into town to get ingredients for my homemade muesli. I haven’t been since the begining of March. It feels like a major expedition requiring planning and strategy! What strange times we live in.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. When I was down town and bought my muesli ingredients I was lucky the shop was almost empty but I know what you mean. I haven’t been down town again and now the shops are open it seems more scary. Going early before people can be bothered to get up is probably the best option. It would be a shame not to be able to eat what I am sure is a healthy meal.

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      1. I went and it was fine – they only allowed 3 people in the shop at one time. I wore a mask, but no-one else did – gosh it is hot under a mask! I feel well stocked with Omega3 now. I like my muesli wheat free and sugar free and full of fruits and nuts. The main car park was about 1/8th full and people were good at keeping a distance. I was pleasantly surprised.

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        1. I shop with a mask but take it off when I come out as it’s not fun wearing it. Glad you got what you needed. My muesli is also added sugar (since there is sugar in fruit) and wheat free with added nuts! I have sultanas and frozen fruit.

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  2. Sharing your journey with others is a great way to help people but unfortunately one doesn’t always see the positive results so I just wanted to stop and say hi 👋
    I’ve been on Instagram a bit more lately and finding that helpful xxx

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Apart from your family, I think you may also have forgotten to mention that you have friends. I think we can impact on the lives of our friends and acquaintances more than we realise, and often in surprising ways. You might leave a supportive comment on a friend’s blog post just at the time when he/she is feeling like a failure, and it could be just what they need to hear to keep them going. Your real-life friends (I mean the people who aren’t known to you only via the interwebs!) probably know you are there for them if they need a shoulder to cry on, or sensible advice with a problem. I suppose this would fall into your category of helping others 🙂

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    1. Interesting ideas but I wouldn’t want you to think that I have much opportunity for usefulness in everyday life. And these days I don’t have any ‘cry on your shoulder friends (if I ever did) just lots of friendly acquaintances.

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  4. Oh bless you. I have had to carry on regardless- Mr E wears a mask I don’t!. When you move house 270 miles with two very kind removal chaps, stop at a service area for you know what, it sort of takes the edge off fear. I swear by hand washing and bleach.
    You were extremely kind to me when I needed it, so once again thank you.
    As to purpose- I have just signed up to crocheting another lap blanket for care homes.
    My best advice is just do the thing in front of you, to the best of your ability and don’t over think things.
    Much love and a virtual hug.xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I am afraid that the scientist in me says that if the graph is leveling off, then the chance of catching the virus is the same tomorrow as it was yesterday and if measures are relaxed (and people are certainly becoming more relaxed and less safety conscious anyway) then the chance of getting it may even be about to rise. I don’t have to go out except for shopping and exercise, there is no one I can see in person, less now than when I had people shopping for me which at least meant I had a moment or two’s conversation. I am a natural introvert so I just have revert to type and accept things the way they are.

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      1. I totally agree. You just have to assume everyone you meet is infectious and act accordingly. I’m still trying to figure out how people will eat in a restaurant whilst wearing a mask. I can’t forsee an occasion when I would sit down inside with a bunch of strangers close by for an hour plus whilst I ate my dinner. Be with family in a garden and eat a picnic -yes. I am lucky in that I have a lot to do, and am just too busy doing it, and of course have Mr E for company.

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        1. I did offer to have my son round for supper again, inside or out but he’s never said yes after that first time. Too scary I guess. I would take a risk with family at a distance but not in a restaurant.

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  5. I hesitate to argue with a scientist …

    … but it is important to keep this in proportion.

    The latest figures show 308,000 cases of Covid-19 in the UK – call it 1 million to allow for those missed (Wikipedia gives a figure of just under 10m worldwide). We can forget those who are asymptomatic! – not a bad way to catch it!

    The population of the UK is 66.8m – so an awful lot of people are not going to catch it! Even if you compare with the 33.6m over 40 the risk is still small – and if you take simple precautions you can make it even smaller. It is not negligible – but life is risky at the best of times.

    I can’t do dinner in your garden – but I could do lunch if the weather is ok. (But not with a mask on!) I am following (most of) the rules – but still go to supermarkets from time to time (and walking in the hills.)

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    1. I would feel more sanguine about it all if there weren’t so many people ignoring the rules and crowding onto beaches and such. I am just waiting for another spike. I had a meal with Michael in the garden a few weeks ago but he’s turned me down since then. I shop in Waitrose when it’s fairly quiet but getting busier I noticed this week. I wish I could go waking in hills or fields. Southampton Common is full enough of people to not be relaxing, so I walk up the side of The Avenue under the trees. Catherine is planning to come down on Tuesday for a walk on The Common, I suggested a picnic but again it might be more relaxing in the garden. Lots of people don’t care too much about social distancing.

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  6. Well, you are still helping people! You responded to my post on your angels back in March -already- (gosh it’s been so long!) But God has a way of delivering these things in a timely manner! Today! I got your post you sent me on April 27 today! You made my night so much brighter just knowing that I sparked creativity in someone else just with my kind note!! I went on your blog and read all about it! I printed it out with the original comment so I can keep that with my angel pattern. I needed a little smile and I got a big one unexpectedly.

    I believe our purpose these days is to just focus on what is really important to us. Things that we thought mattered before hardly even seem relevant anymore. We are getting to see what is really important now and for our futures. I have been going outside with my kids and spending time with them in the last two days. Up until now I have had my nose in my computer hardly caring much about anything else. Breathing the fresh air and spending time with them has been wonderful. It certainly is a time for strengthening relationships with the ones who matter the most and distancing from the ones that were tearing you down. I’ve never been as close with my husband as I am now that he is working from home. It used to be that the kids would go to school, he’d go to work, I’d be all alone. When he got home it’d be 6 and time for dinner and soon after that the kids would go to bed. I’d work three nights a week until 1am including Fridays and Saturdays. And every day would be the same all over again. I felt like none of us really got to spend any quality time together and it was definitely starting to strain our family. I’m thankful for a change, but a little saddened at how it had to come about.
    Thank your for brightening my day and making me feel so nice from such a distance.

    ~Michelle

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Glad there has been some benefits for you at this difficult time. Reminds me of the proverb – It’s an ill wind that blows nobody any good. – Make the most of your time with your children, the years we have them with us are so short really.

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